I just finished my latest program to bridge the gap from the "pickup" and "seduction" community to some real SOLID social skills. This is the next of my programs dealing with social skills and influence. This program covers ALL areas of social awareness dealing with the "game players" out there. The primary focus is on understanding all the different types of game playing personalities, emotional vampires, and emotional blackmailers. I go into detail about how to spot their games, and handle them all. This program covers almost every way a person can manipulate or tool you in the real world, from your boss to your family to your coworkers to your friends to your boyfriend or girlfriend.
|Published (Last):||2 September 2007|
|PDF File Size:||14.65 Mb|
|ePub File Size:||11.77 Mb|
|Price:||Free* [*Free Regsitration Required]|
This has nothing to do with genetics, intelligence, or the forces that you might think of as being "out of your control In nearly every person with any great level of success and fulfillment in their lives, the only thing that mattered was how well they managed the other people in their lives.
I was blown away when I discovered that, and it really changed the way I looked at the world. For years I had believed that there were certain people who were just luckier than others, or just had the gift of "people skills Look, I have to admit something I would go out and not have the faintest idea of how to handle a conversation when I got into it.
I usually ended up talking about the one topic I knew the most. You know how they say that you should "talk about what you know about"? Well the problem was, the only topic I talked about was ME.
I would just yammer on and on about my life and all about me, not understanding how it was turning people off. This lack of social skill and ability was killing a BIG part of my social life. I even found myself becoming very negative about people in general. That other people are just flaky, manipulative, and self-centered? Think about it: Has anyone ever sat you down and explained how people try to manipulate you with guilt?
Has anyone ever showed you how other people can trick you into doing what THEY want you to do? Has anyone ever explained to you how people use your insecurities and fears as a way to steer or control you? How do I learn these social skills that I saw other people using all the time?
These people seemed like such master communicators with this GIFT for handling people. I had no idea where to start learning how they do it. After all, to get social skills and confidence, you need to hang out and talk to people I was in a catch! It was a double-bind. I had nowhere to get started, and I spent over ten years in this frustrated state.
I literally felt like a rat in one of those mazes, trying desperately to find the secret exit to get out. Because I knew if I could just get a look at the maze from above instead of being stuck IN it, I could find the solution. Then I finally figured it out I went through years and years of research trying figure out what was happening in these social situations.
I read TONS of self-help books, and very few of them really had any real explanation about what was happening. Nothing I found helped me to figure out the "rules" of these games people play. I even went to seminars on group and relationship dynamics, but no luck. I got very lucky to find some friends who I knew had some very powerful - and yet compassionate - methods for handling people who try to play games with you.
When I sat them down and described some of the things I saw that they were doing, they were as amazed as I was. You see, they had learned these things on an intuitive level that you and I never got to develop. A "technique" is just knowing the right thing to say at the right time. AND you can use them to destroy the games you play in your own head, as well as the ones other people play with you. I want to tell you about all three right here so you can be on your guard And you simply dread talking to them.
Pretty soon, you just avoid being around them at all, if you can help it. Another part of you realizes that if you do avoid them, then THEY are the ones who are still winning the game, even without you around. How do you spot this personality type? How do you deal with them? The best defense here is a best offense, which is made up of my 3-part strategy: 1 Start by recognizing how they work, and being prepared for them up front.
You need to recognize their game before they blow the whistle and start the play. You have to let them show you their cards, and then you can choose your own strategy. Once you have them invested in their approach, you can then use it to steer the social dynamics toward a win-win finish.
This is the next kind of gamer In its most innocent form, you may have just wanted to get a little appreciation from someone in your life. Have you ever done a favor and said, "Oh, it was nothing Innocent enough, but still a game. All of these people are playing a powerful kind of emotional game with us - Blackmail.
What they do, through some subtle - and sometimes not-so-subtle games is put us in a position where we are forced to do something to avoid a nasty embarrassment of some kind. They may not mean to play a game, but it comes out anyway.
If you feel like you did something against your will to avoid a negative outcome - an outcome that the other person could control - then chances are you were blackmailed. The best offense is a great defense, and especially so with this type of game player.
Very often, the emotional blackmailer loses their ability to control you or manipulate you when you expose their game out into the open. In fact this type flaunts their power over you. Maybe this is the person at work that pushes you into helping them for fear of their influence and power - or their ability to damage your career Maybe this is the woman that creates uncomfortable social situations - like crying fits or emotional tantrums - to get you to give in to her demands Quite honestly, these people can also be emotional terrorists.
Look, I know how charged a word that can be I even debated mentioning it at all, but when I wrote it down, I knew that I was just telling the Truth. The Emotional Bully is the kind of person can literally make your life a living hell with constant demands, emotional tirades, and total unpredictability.
They leave you with a feeling of dread and anxiety 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If you sense that you might be dealing with an emotional bully, remember that these covert abusers are often very good at covering their tracks, so other people might not see what you are experiencing. The best way to start is to make a note of abusive incidents so that you can review them later on when your head is clear.
One thing that you must get in the habit of doing is to not let the emotions of a game playing situation run away from you so that you react badly and only make your situation worse. But the good news is that the emotional bully responds to some very simple strategies that end their games FAST. Is There Any Hope? What I thought was just one problem - not having social skills - was actually TWO problems in one.
I am excited to say that there is a happy ending to this story. For both me and you. Most of the social gamers are not playing you intentionally, even when it seems like they are. We learned how to play games and manipulate like this from examples of other people.
Usually by our families. And the cool thing is Yes, you play games, too. We all do. It actually becomes FUN to play with people and get into social dynamics - no matter what kind, because you know that whatever someone can come up with, you have an arsenal of social skills of your own to handle them.
And your social network will explode without you even realizing it. I noticed that when I would talk to people, and I could get past the games, I was able to really establish an indestructible sense of rapport. This happened with women, men - everyone I socialized with. It got to the point where I had to start being very careful with this skill because people were forming some unhealthy dependencies on me.
One woman even told me she felt like I understood her ten times more than her therapist This is really about developing your vital social powers to the point where you can actually let down your guard and get REAL with people like you never thought possible. That person can be YOU.
Did You Know? Unfortunately, being an introvert can lead to being social handicapped later on, so its important to understand how to work with your personality type The worst thing you can do to a socially manipulative person is expose them. If you do, most often they will find a way to retaliate, or cause you even more problems down the road. Which is why you must know the strategies I teach to handle them Once you learn what they are, you can avoid being manipulated or hurt, and you can almost always get to a winning solution for both of you If you understand these basic social skills, you create a "template" within your mind that allows you to handle any relationship - with any person A moment ago I told you about how I managed to capture some of these "natural" people - the men and women that are socially successful in any situation.
They are like chameleons, able to blend into any social situation and make it work for them. Well, their knack for social power can also work for YOU. I managed to capture their techniques and their social strategies for you to learn. What I did was create a home-study audio program where you can learn these Power Social Skills in your car, on the bus, or anywhere you like.
This program is the very first of its kind, designed from the ground up to help you overcome any of your social limitations and pull you out into the world like never before. How "stroking" is used in conversation to influence you and steer your decision making - and how to spot it before someone brainwashes you into their goals
Power Social Skills
Power Social Skills – Download
Carlos Xuma – Power Social Skills